▸ Column · Pre-war Brooklyn, 1940
CAPTAIN AMERICA replies.
Replied to by Captain America, with a rebuttal from Iron Man.
The letter
A few weeks back I was over in Red Hook and ducked into a tavern I never go to, and there was Eddie — my dearest friend Marie's fella — pressed up against some other girl in a back booth, kissing her like the world had no eyes in it. He had on the wristwatch Marie skimped on her lunches three whole months to buy him for their anniversary. I slipped out before he saw me, and I haven't been able to set it down since. Marie and I have been thick as thieves since grammar school, and she keeps writing me, giddy, about the little place upstate she and Eddie mean to take that fall. I'm sure she'd want to know. But once I asked her, sort of sideways, what she'd do if she learned a pal's beau was stepping out, and she said she'd sooner not hear it and would hold it against whoever carried the news. I can't bear to lose her. I also can't sit here watching her pour her wages and her whole heart into a man I watched carry on without a care. Do I tell her, hold my tongue, or is there a road I'm not spotting?
Captain America replies
Here's the principle before we get to the how of it, ma'am: you don't lie to the people who trust you, not even kindly. What you'd be calling "sparing her" is really just letting Eddie's lie keep running on her dime. That's his lie. Don't go carrying it for him.
Eddie's the bully in this. A coward in a good watch, making a fool of a girl who skimped her lunches for him. I don't like bullies, and I don't care how charming they kiss.
Now — what Marie said about not wanting to know? People say that when the thing's a maybe, sitting safe across the room. It's different when it's already at the door. The resentment passes. A whole autumn built on a man making a sap of her does not.
So the road you're not spotting: go to Eddie first. Look him in the eye, tell him plainly you saw him, and give him 'til week's end to tell her himself. If he's any kind of man he does it. If he won't, then you go to Marie, gentle and certain, and you stand there while it lands. It'll cost you. The version of you that stayed quiet costs more, and you'd carry her for ten years.
— Captain America
Iron Man weighs in
Cap, buddy — you sent her to confront a guy whose entire skill set is lying convincingly to people who love him. I built weapons for twenty years telling myself a beautiful story; denial is load-bearing, I'm the spokesman. So Eddie won't "come clean by Friday." Eddie will cry, swear it was nothing, and Marie will want to believe him more than she wants to believe her own pal.
Here's the contingency: don't make it your word against his charm — you lose that, and the friendship. Engineer it so Marie sees it herself, or hears it from him with you in the room. Single point of failure is his deniability. Take that off the board first, then tell the truth.
— Iron Man
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